ILUSOH.COM
Family...
Something I have always dreamt of having..
I do not talk much about my first 7 years of my life. I was in an abusive and totally dysfunctional family. care, nurturing, physical contact (for loving reasons) did not happen..
So when I went to high school at West Nottingham, it was the first real experience where I lived in a close environment where people actually did care for each other. It was the first experience that I had that neared the family.
Then in New Orleans in the throes of the hippy era there was a time I lived in a commune. We were dedicated to community service running a free clinic, and also a crisis intervention center. There was an extreme bond that I had to those people and it was the closest I have ever had to a family. Those were my happiest days as far as feeling a family love.
My happiest days were at Nottingham...
I pray to see it again one day....
I had always dreamt of having my own family. My own traditions.. I wanted a little girl so I could scare the hell out of anyone trying to date her, as well as spoil her.. Ah well it seems not to be in this lifetime...
Often when younger, I would find families that were happy and functional. I stayed around them as much as possible.. Like the Stephenson's in Recife Brazil.. Secretly I prayed that they would adopt me..
I never told to many people about the abuse, or what I had not blacked out...